We all have different ways of communicating that reflect our personalities. But healthy communication exists best when spouses are both developing the skill of assertive communication. An assertive spouse develops a clear understanding of what their spouse feels, thinks and wants. They work on dealing directly, honestly, and, most importantly, respectfully with their spouse. For example, during a financial...
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In the new movie 90 Minutes in Heaven, Don Piper came back to life after a head-on collision with an 18-wheeler. His incredible story got me thinking what I’d do differently if today was my last day. First, I’d pour out my love to my wife and children. There’s no one on earth I love more so I need to show it more. Second, I’d spend all my time with my family. My family is a top priority and the best of my time...
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An elephant never forgets. When they are too small to escape, we train elephants in captivity by shackling their ankles and staking them down. They try to tug away from their bonds, but eventually learn they can't get loose. That’s when their “elephant memory” takes over. For the rest of their lives, they remember they can't get away. Likewise, when someone makes a careless comment to a child, like, “You’re...
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It’s not some high-tech gadget you can pick up at a store… it’s a sense of belonging. So how can you instill that in your kids? At home, let your kids know they’re important to you, and to your family. Affirm their positive character traits, encourage their unique gifts, and let them know their thoughts and opinions matter. Then, when you’re out in public, praise them to others – and proudly claim them: “This is...
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A lot of parents have a hard time telling the difference. And that’s a problem. You’ve seen it…a mom dressed like her teenage daughter. A dad who offers his teenage son a beer while they watch the game. When mom or dad becomes a buddy, the child loses out on the most important relationship…that of parent and child. Your kids have plenty of friends, what they need from you is guidance, love, and boundaries....
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We all have challenges and battles in life and in marriage. The new movie War Room reminds us that we do have weapons to fight that battle well. First, we must engage with humility. We must realize that we’re not always right and that we must listen to our spouses and look out for their best interests. Second, we must sacrifice. Sometimes we have to lay down our wants and reinforce our spouses even when we don’t...
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If your mom nagged you about the importance of good posture, she knew what she was talking about. Good physical posture can have positive effects. The same thing is true in relationships. Good relational posture is also important. For healthier relationships, start with a posture of humility. Humility acknowledges that you need other people—and not just to do what you want them to. Humility recognizes other...
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