Before you pack your bags and call it quits, here are some questions to ask. First, ask, “Have we done everything we can to rehabilitate our marriage?” It’s important to fight hard for your marriage—whether it’s by seeking counseling, slaying addictions or reprioritizing your life. Second, ask, “Is there unresolved conflict?” Instead of covering up your hurts, try sharing and working through those feelings...
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Before you take the first step down that painful path, here are 3 truths to consider. First, remember your vows. You promised to have and to hold your spouse from this day forward for better or for worse. This commitment was meant to be for a lifetime. Second, remember what marriage is. It’s not a conditional contract, but an unconditional covenant of love. The difference? A contract is all about what you...
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Superman’s virtually indestructible, but he can be brought to his knees by a tiny piece of rock. Kryptonite drains him of his powers and makes him vulnerable. Prolonged exposure will even kill him. Well, what about us mere mortals? In marriage, we can often see the big things coming. But the small things… criticism, indifference, keeping score… these little radioactive stones can creep up on us and slowly zap...
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My wife, Susan, and I just celebrated 24 years of marriage. After more than two decades together, you’d think we’d always have smooth sailing… but we don’t. We both work really hard to have a great marriage. So, why can’t we get it all together? It’s our selfish nature… we want things from each other that we don’t always get. She wants me to cherish, affirm and encourage her. I want her physical affection....
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You can’t see where you are going; you’ve lost your vision. Maybe you’ve lost your vision for your marriage. The road you were heading down with your spouse was suddenly engulfed by an affair, illness, cancer, or an addiction. You once could see a bright future for your child, but the light has dimmed because of rebellion, drugs, or sickness. So, what can you do? First, pull over. Stop what you are doing for a...
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Well, for a flame to exist, you have to have fuel. You know those old pictures you have tucked away… the love letters you’ve saved… the texts you exchange… the seemingly harmless flirtations on Facebook. These are the fuel that—given a spark—might just become a raging inferno. So, the first step to extinguish an old flame is to get rid of the fuel source. Throw out the reminders, get rid of the pictures of...
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Susan recently shared how she felt some bitterness in our marriage. She explained how I sometimes tell her to stop using unkind words toward me, and then I turn around and do the same thing a few minutes later. She gets frustrated. And that frustration, when not dealt with, leads to unresolved anger and then bitterness. I asked for forgiveness and worked to change my errant ways. Here are 4 things a spouse can...
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